Reboot - Day 29: the beginning is in the ending

Today I will break my fast. I'm attending a retreat this weekend and will join my table-mates at dinner tonight. I've prepped juices to last me through today. I've packed veggies and hummus, fruit, nuts, and almond butter. There will be enough food choices at meals to allow me to make good choices. The fruits and veggies I'm taking will help me ease back into solid food. I wonder how I'm going to feel not having any juice at all on Saturday? I'm already anticipating juicing as soon as I'm home on Sunday - or finding the nearest Whole Foods or Nekter once I leave the campground. Sunday I'll be in downtown LA with my daughter and I don't think I'll pass up on a bacon-wrapped hotdog from a street vendor...it's a tradition I'm unwilling to break. :)

Now that it's coming to a close it seems like it went quickly. Of course I remember being at 20 days and feeling like it was never going to end. Facing the end of the fast fills me with a bit of trepidation.
Has it been long enough to build new habits? Will my discipline to juice transfer over to discipline with my day-to-day diet? What will it be like to eat food again? I'm sure it will be shockingly easy to scarf down anything I choose to put in my mouth (Sunday's hotdog will test and prove my wonderings.)

I'm so glad that I did this fast. I feel so much better and encouraged that I can take control of the out-of-control areas of my life. I confessed to friends last night that the focus required on this one thing for the last 30 days makes me feel like I've missed out on other things - and I have. My mind isn't (yet) trained to welcome that exchange. Giving up things that are unhealthy or are bad for me isn't the difficult choice; it's giving up on things that aren't necessarily bad for me. It's admitting what's not bad for me but might also not be good for me. That gray area is just so...gray. My success in completing this fast is shining some light on it and, with God's loving-kindness and long-suffering grace, I will be able to see the difference between what's good and what's best.

I'll give an update next week about my transition back onto solid food.

Reboot - Day 21

Today is Thursday and Thursday is weigh-in day. I weigh myself on two different scales (for no particular reason) and last week they were exactly the same: 161.5 lbs. Today they had a 3 lb. difference. The standard step-on style weighed me at 156 lbs. The other scale, the kind with the slider weight that doctors used to use, weighed me at 153 lbs. Ok. I'm happy with either number.

I imagine 3-8 lbs of the weight loss can be attributed to cleaned out intestines. I've dropped a pant size (remember that I'm 5 feet 9 inches and 10 lbs is worth a pants size to me. I'm much more comfortable in my clothes and have a couple blouses that I'll have to take in so I can keep them in my wardrobe. I also have a couple pairs of pants that are still a bit snug, one of which I just bought last weekend. Not sure if that's positive thinking or wishful thinking.

Reboot - Day 15 The Choice is Mine

Woohoo! I love things that make me say 'wohoo'. It's one of my favorite words. Today, it's definately a woohoo day. For two reasons: I've juice fasted for 15 days. I think that's quite an accomplishment for me and I could easily forget to celebrate it in light of reason #2...I only have 15 days to go! I'm hungry right now so the idea of filling my tummy is quelshing my feelings of accomplishment. Give me a second while I go drink a bit of juice...

Ok, all better. And that's the thing; my empty stomach is just as filled by juice as it would be by any other late night snack. The problem is I've been craving bad foods (candy, cake - I'm a cake-aholic, chips) more in the last couple days than in the first 10. Let's face it, chocolate chip cookies and chips and ice cream are delicious but I'm craving them mentally more than for taste. I get stressed at work and I want candy. I'm 'too tired' to cook so I stop for a pint of ice cream. There's a bowl of chips in front of me so why not eat them all? Stress, fatigue, boredom, habit. They're triggers and they're all still here, lurking just below my resolve to feel better.

And that's what I hope to get out of the next 15 days. I hope that my resolve grows, my bad cravings are replaced with good, my laziness about cooking is replaced with the new habit of being in the kitchen everyday, my taste preferences are reset, and that I feel better and better. And better. Good enough that I see poor food choices for what they are; my choices to live good or to live poorly.

Reboot - Days 7 & 8

I've been hungrier on days 7 & 8. Both mornings I've had juices that were all fruits and I wonder if that might be it. Today (day 8) I forgot to add chia seeds to the juices. I've also had lunch meetings both days. I made it through without too much suffering. Yesterday's lunch was at a delicious meditarranean restaurant and I found myself wanting to run my finger through anyone's hummus. I had a nice Mean Green juice with me so I was full and content enough to keep my fingers off everyone's plates.

When I know I'm going to be around food I either drink a juice just before or while I'm there. If I'm full I can't want to eat. That's part of retraining my mind during this time. I can and have had long-term success with eating only when hungry and not over-eating to keep my weight down. It was a habit I had to build after years of over-eating for social or emotional reasons. Crazy that I had to train myself to only eat what I needed. Anyway, it took about 6 months to get there. Then 2 weeks on vacation eating out all over Los Angeles/Orange County ruined my good habit and I never recovered. Until now.

I weighed myself this morning after 7 full days on juice. I'm down about 4 lbs. this week. I'm not exactly sure where I started; I was already down 3-4 lbs. in the 2 weeks before starting the Reboot. As I said earlier, I'm not doing this primarily for weight-loss but it's a wonderful 'side-effect'.

I've not had the rush of energy lots of people experience. It's early in the fast so I'm not worrying about it. None of the Sjogren's symptoms have subsided and my tongue is actually stinging worse than ever. I had a regular-ish bowel movement yesterday and the massive air movements have subsided. I'm still sorting out which juices to make and how much to buy and, and, and... As of today I'm more than 1/4 of the way through the fast and I'm good. I'm not in rush for it to be over. I want to keep going until I feel great.

Reboot - Days 5

The morning started out with me feeling light headed and a mental foginess. My blood pressure runs low so I figured that might be the culprit. I read that blood pressure can drop during a fast because the body isn't working so hard to digest food (my paraphrase). I'm also cold, another result of lowered blood pressure. Anyway, I checked it out online and concluded that I didn't drink enough water over the weekend. I'm not one to carry around a water bottle and I'm not eating meals, at which I typically drink water. I keep a pitcher of water at my desk at work and have upped even my normal water intake. It seems I'll have to start carrying water with me on the weekends.

As the day progressed (and I got more hydrated) I felt better for the most part with good energy and not hungry. I'm sleeping like a champ, too. I'm an 8-hour per night sleeper who usually operates on 6-7 hours. I'm ready for bed by 9 pm these days but not getting into bed til about 10:30 and sleeping soundly til 6 am. Sleeping through the night is not a given for me and I would love if it's a long-lasting benefit of the fast.

Another 'new' thing today has been volumes of air passing through me. It's not gas, just air. I feel like I have to get to a bathroom toot suite and then it's billows of air. I'm not sure what to expect with my digestion during this. I'll have to check it out on rebootwithjoe.com tonight. Hopefully this will pass in the next day or so (no pun intended).

And I loved the strawberry-kale-apple juice and will definitely make it again.